Do I Need a Life Coach?

Last year, Virginia and I felt we had hit a roadblock in our relationship and needed help. We had been through a rough couple of years, mainly with my health. I had three strokes from July to October of 2017. It was a stressful time and put a lot of pressure on us.

At first, we were just glad I was alive, but as a result of the stress we experienced, we begin to see things in our relationship that we were not happy about. We talked with friends and saw a counselor, but just didn’t feel we were making the progress we needed to make. My brother, Jim, is a Life Coach, and we spoke with him about what we were going through and agreed it would good to meet with him.

Several months later, I would say we have made real progress, and the good thing is, so would Virginia! We have learned and are learning how to become more emotionally healthy. We are learning to identify and manage our feelings in a healthy way. In fact, we are discovering some of our conflict had nothing to do with us as a couple but more to do with issues from our past we had never fully dealt with ourselves. We need to remember we have an accuser who is the Father of Lies and is constantly lying to us.

Why Would I Need a Life Coach?

You might ask the question, “Why would I need a Life Coach?” The Bible instructs us to seek counsel; God has made us members of a body who need one another (1 Corinthians 12:12-26). Some of these members are gifted at seeing a problem and helping us see the problem so God can change us. I think good Life Coaches are gifted to do that.

Proverbs 24:3-6 says:

“By wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established;

by knowledge the rooms are filled with all precious and pleasant riches.

A wise man is full of strength, and a man of knowledge enhances his might,

for by wise guidance you can wage your war, and in abundance of counselors there is victory.”

Two Keys to Receiving from a Life Coach

One reason our experience with a Life Coach has been beneficial is that I realized I needed help. I am the only person I can change, but often, we think other people are the problem. Change starts with me realizing I need help. I need to see things from a different perspective. I need to understand how I feel and how I tend respond to those feelings in a situation.

The other key to receiving this kind of help was realizing I needed to learn to manage my emotions. Jesus felt emotions, but was able to respond without sinning. A Life Coach directs or gives advice or strategy to us, but at end of the day, we choose how we are going to respond.

A question my Life Coach asks me is, “How would you like to respond emotionally the next time that situation comes up?” And believe me, it will. Jim has helped me become more of a reflective, rather than reactive, thinker.

Lastly, it’s important to remember that coaches coach, but we play the game. Getting good counsel is one piece of the puzzle, but it won’t solve everything. We have to learn to listen and apply what we are hearing.